On second thought

June 22, 2010 at 6:46 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 5 Comments

Thanks to all who replied to my last post.  It was several months coming, and more of a last straw than a rational evaluation of the situation in which I find myself.  The problem is more my dislike of spine and the realization of just how big a part of neurosurgery it is, than anything else.  When you’re a student, you get to pick and choose (to some extent) the kinds of patients you follow and the kinds of surgeries you see.  And prior to this year, I was privileged to rotate only at large programs, where the faculty were highly specialized and could limit their practices.  As a result, I was able to avoid spine almost entirely.  And even when I couldn’t, I managed to scrub only with the cool people.

But it’s easily 60-70% of what you do. And it’s what pays the bills. So I think you have to like spine, at least on some level, in order to be a neurosurgeon.

And mostly I’ve just realized how miserable my life would be if I had to do that much spine in my practice.  In addition to dealing every day with the kind of personalities that neurosurgery seems to attract.

It’s been very difficult to sort out all the pieces of this puzzle–to figure out which of the things I dislike are situational and which are fundamental to the field.   To understand why I’ve enjoyed neurosurgery everywhere else I’ve been, but not here.  Put simply, I was sheltered elsewhere, and here I’m not.  Also, the omnipresent death and devastation does get to you after a while.  Even with a tolerance for disaster as high as mine.

It’s been a useful experience, though, and the skills and knowledge I’ve gained will likely serve me well in the future.  So no regrets.