Names (updated repost)

April 15, 2012 at 11:39 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Whenever I look at my list of Facebook friends, it irritates me how many of them have the same name. Approximately 5% of them are Chris/Christines, another 5% are Davids, 4% are Eric/k, 4% John, 3% Jennifer, 3% Kim, 3% some version of Laura, and 3% are Marc/k. That’s 30% of my friends whose parents are lemmings. And I have three friends who named their boys Ryan. So clearly the apple didn’t fall far from the tree. It bothers me to scroll down and see Chris This, Chris That, Chris Theother, Chris Somethingelse. Particularly when I think of how very different they all are from each other. It seems a little insulting for them all to have the same name.

I was named after my great-grandmother, who supposedly was the great-granddaughter of a notable indian chief. And I like that it has a story, that there’s a reason it was given to me, even though it was at the nadir of its popularity at the time. My parents also gave me a nickname, and both are useful, depending on the situation. But when I was younger, people would always ask, “how do you get X nickname from Z given name?” My answer was factual, that it’s a less common diminutive, but still correct. Now I just say, “How do you get Jack from John, or Peg from Margaret? So STFU.” Although the STFU part is just in my head.

My point is, if you’re having a kid this year, please do not call your son Jacob (#1 boys name, 2009) or your daughter Isabella (#1 girls name, 2009). Or Katniss, or Gale, or Peeta. You think you’re being wonderfully creative, naming them after characters in a book you like. But think about what it will be like for them in 6th grade to have at least three girls in every class with the exact same name. On the rare occasion that some other girl had the same name as me, it felt like a) I couldn’t be friends with her, and b) she was stealing my identity. Of course, it can also go the other way, for example the packs of Ashleys and Jessicas of years past. But that was really an exceptional situation.

People seem to have realized how ridiculous that was, and so this decade there’s been much more variety in what people name their girls.  IMHO, the best gift you can give a girl is her own identity, whether that’s a less than common name, or simply a meaningful story behind a more common one. The next best gift is also to give her an option that allows her to blend in, when that’s what she needs instead. Tweens are mean, so give your kids some armor.